Saturday, June 4, 2011

Communication: Introduction

I have known since I was about 14, when my parents almost had divorced, that communication in a marriage is vital! My parents were never really good at the whole communication thing when dad was working 3rd shifts. I was an observant child though and I took particular note of that. Money, Sex and Communication (or rather the lack there of in all three counts) are the typical causes of divorce in most marriages. I want to focus on communication, but there are so many areas to speak to and I like to keep these posts decently short and easy to read, so I have decided to break this up into a series. The following posts will be about the various aspects of communication.

One thing that it highly important is knowing what your "Love Language" is and more importantly what your spouses is too! What is a Love Language? I'm not talking about French or Italian, I'm talking about the 5 Love Languages set forth by Gary Chapman in his book aptly named "The 5 Love Languages." "Sure," you might be thinking, "a guy who preaches on love telling me to read a book about 5 types of love... I wonder what his cut is?" I don't get a cut... It helped me a long time ago and I figure it can help you too. Check it out at your library, book store or http://www.5lovelanguages.com/. Breifly, they are Physical Touch,Words of Affirmation,  Quality Time, Acts of Service and Receiving Gifts (and yes that is the order of my love languages).

I urge you and your spouse to read this book as Gary Chapman does a much better job at explaining all of this than I could, but it is an important component to communication in your marriage and with those around you too! If you knew how to make your spouse feel absolutely loved just by communicating in their love language, would you want to do it? And remember, this is another one of those areas where you both must be selfless. You are not trying to find your love language for yourself or to pound into your spouse. You are trying to find your spouses love language so you can demonstrate your love for your spouse more effectively and more often!

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